Does BBC Three need more time slots for Two Pints reruns or something? Boo, I say. Boo. What with the other recent “lololol Tennant was better and now it’s too complicated because it requires me to think or something and Matt Smith is shite because he has no eyebrows” news of lowest-common-denominator woe, it’s been a crap week for Who, especially those of us who are enjoying the revived show more than ever right now. Meeeep:(((((
From the article: “Doctor Who Confidential has been a great show for BBC3 over the years but our priority now is to build on original British commissions, unique to the channel.” Wow, that is some prime Bureaucracyspeak, that is. I think I can translate it, though: “We’re going to gradually ditch all this expensive scifi stuff for period drama because we already have the costumes.” I’ll bet you after the 50th anniversary in 2013 they ditch the show.
I’ve been going through some of the dialogue from some of the this season’s Who episodes that I’ve missed, and I just can’t accept the way the series is turning out so far. My disjointed and possibly incoherent objections are as follows:
You know, I’m kind of hoping that the Doctor’s upcoming “death” is just the death of depressing, depressive, “I’m useless and a danger to all my friends” Doctor, and we get cool, crazy haired, (possibly evil but who cares) Eyepatch Doctor. Who’s with me?
o1. tell me the truth, what made you start liking the person you like right now?
You mean myself? Er… the usual contemplation of my own magnificence, of course.
o2. what on your body is hurting or bothering you?
My head. From all you lot. Stop that stuff.
o3. what was your last thought before going to bed last night?
All I ask is one night without fifteen pee breaks.
o4. what are you listening to?
o5. what’s something you’re not looking forward to?
That list is too long. Also, none of your business.
o6. where do you think your best friend is right now?
I’m sitting right here in my chair.
o7. have you kissed anybody in the last five days?
EW. Gross, no.
o8. sex on the first date?
HELL NO. God, teenagers are sluts these days.
o9. kiss on the first date?
Peck on cheek IS ALL. But only if I like you. Not that I date — I quit that nonsense ages ago.
1o. is there one person you want to be with right now?
I’m already with that person — me.
11. are you seriously happy with where you are in life?
Not really but not unhappy either.
12. is there something you would like to say to someone?
STOP TAILGATING ME YOU ASSHOLES. (This is directed at everyone else in the state of Virginia.)
13. what are three things you did today?
Drank coffee. Petted the neighbor cat. Read my email.
14. would you rather sleep at a friend’s or have them over?
Oh I forgot, this thing is for teens. Well, in the long ago era, sometime around the Jurassic, when I was a teenge sauropod, I preferred to sleep over at my friends’ homes because my friends were cool and my obnoxious sister wasn’t there to bother me.
15. what is your favorite kind of gum?
I don’t chew gum.
16. are you friends with any of your ex boyfriends/ girlfriends?
17. what is on your wrists right now?
Skin. (My own, you freaks. I don’t wear jewelry or a watch because anything on my wrists bothers me.)
18. ever liked someone you thought you didn’t stand a chance with?
Yeah. Various rock stars and actors and my thoughts that I didn’t “stand a chance” were realistic. I wasn’t that stupid.
19. does anyone have strong feelings for you?
There had better not be as I have no intention of reciprocating.
2o. are you slowly drifting away from someone?
21. have you ever wasted your time on someone?
Yes, everyone but myself.
22. can you do the alphabet in sign language?
23. how have you felt today?
24. you receive $60 without any reason, what do you spend it on?
Film, food, coffee.
25. what is wrong with you right now?
Nothing. I am perfection itself. Well, except for a nagging post-nasal-drip and cough. Stupid allergies.
26. is there anyone you’re really disappointed in?
No. When you get to be my age, human perfidy no longer surprises you.
27. would you rather have starbucks or jamba juice right now?
Starbucks (which isn’t a drink, it’s a chain of coffee places, but we’ll let that slide for now). Jamba juice sounds like something they feed monkeys at the zoo.
28. why aren’t you in ‘love’ with your last ex anymore?
Because I have moved on in my life.
29. how late did you stay up last night and why?
Because refreshing Tumblr over and over is my life. Ha, kidding.
3o. when was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?
I don’t make a habit of talking to myself.
31. what were you doing an hour ago?
Driving on the interstate, hating everyone else driving on it for being braindead motherfucking tailgating assholes.
32. what are you looking forward to in the next month?
Cooler weather and autumn color.
33. are you wearing jeans right now?
34. are you a patient person?
No. Can we get on with this?
35. do you think you can last in a relationship for three months?
I’m not interested.
36. favorite color?
37. did you have a dream last night?
I can’t remember. I rarely have interesting dreams.
38. are you wearing jeans, shorts, sweatpants, or pajama pants?
You already asked once if I was “wearing jeans” and now you want details. Okay: I’m wearing two pasties and a cork.
39. if someone could be cuddling you right now, who would you want it to be?
Are you trying to make me vomit? I wasn’t this sickening when *I* was a teenager.
4o. do you love anyone who is not related to you?
I don’t even love anyone related to me. (Not counting myself, of course.)
41. if someone liked you right now, what would you want them to tell you?
"I’m giving you one million dollars."
42. do you like meeting new people?
I have no problem doing so, but I don’t go out of my way to meet people. I am not a “people” person.
43. are you afraid of falling in love?
For God’s sakes. Who wrote this, Stephanie Meyers?
44. ever liked someone older than you?
45. has anyone ever told you that you have pretty eyes?
Yes, so much so that I got tired of hearing it. It meant nothing to me. I don’t care what I look like, and never did.
46. have you ever felt like you weren’t good enough?
Occasionally, but I always remember who I am, the Most Interesting Woman In The World, and then I feel better. (Seriously, no wonder teenagers are committing suicide right and left if this is the sort of thing they dwell on all the time.)
(Note: this is a reblog, but for some reason the formatting was really shitty. My answers, if you couldn’t tell, are in bold.)
But the fandom makes me to be embarrassed to be a part of it based on how so many people act.
Remember when Rose was really popular, and then Martha came along for Season 3? All the Rose fans were whining and “oh…
Blog just wants to express confusion of Blog that “Rosefen” is bad connotation of name. Marthafen are called Marthafen and Riverfen are called Riverfen. It fine, it all good. Fen names neutral although obviously can be used in negative ways like “urg, Craigfen, why they so batshit about Doctor/Craig THOSE WHORES.”
I’ve always heard the term “Rosefen” used mockingly, but then I only read mockery of Rose so that could have colored my perception.
Anyway, for me a day without hating All Other Doctor Who Fans is like a day without sunshine*, so I don’t have any problems with the River story fandom per se. My problem is with the River story itself, which has dropped several points on the coolness meter by giving us a backstory that involved the Doctor knowing her from infancy. That’s just… so many levels of wrong in my book. I mean, I know the Doctor is a practically immortal alien and that all humans (except, I guess, Jack Harkness and what’s-‘er-name who was just a flap of skin) are like children in a sense to him, but there’s a difference between a mature being of any race and a child of same. I can’t think of any universe where meeting the child version of your lover wouldn’t put a big dent in the romance for anyone who wasn’t a pervert. Sorry, that’s my prejudice. Maybe men think differently — if so, that makes me even more glad I stayed single. I’ll have to write a long post on this someday.
*You are all fools! FOOLS! Only I am right. About everything.
I finished Frontier in Space, then watched Planet of the Daleks, and Shada. I have some things to say about the first two. I may get to Shada later though it was only a partially shot serial — still, it had Four and Romana and had several lovely bits. Oh — and Professor Chronotis was a dear. Oh what, another Time Lord that isn’t evil? Unpossible!
In the late Seventies when I was in my late teens.
Who is your Doctor?
Tom Baker, Doctor No. 4.
Romana I and II.
Least favourite companion?
ROES. Rose was okay though. From the old show: Nyssa. She wasn’t offensive, but she wasn’t anything. She was just there.
Old show: The Ribos Operation. New Show: The Doctor’s Wife.
Least favourite episode?*
Old show: The Two Doctors, wherein we learn that people who eat meat are no better than cannibals (the showrunner at the time was a fanatical vegetarian), and the Sixth Doctor kills someone with his bare hands and a cyanide-soaked rag. Also it trashed the 2nd Doctor and Jaime. Ugh. On the other hand, the Androgum woman’s dress was gorgeous. New show: Love and Monstersl. What the hell was that.
Old show: Series 16. Reason why: “Douglas Adams took over as script editor.” New show: uh… the first one with Eleven, and what I’ve seen of this latest one. Despite all the problems I’m having with the scripts and the direction of the show, Matt Smith is just such a wonderful Doctor.
Least favourite series?
Old show, Season 26. That would be the last year of the old show’s run, with the Seventh Doctor. I actually liked Seven, and Ace was a great companion, but the scripts seem to have been written after an all night pot-and-booze jag. Of the new show: despite the fact that nothing about Nine (neither his character nor his relationship with Rose) enraged me the way Ten’s run did, I’ll have to pick Series 1, as it’s the one I only watched through once and didn’t feel inclined to go through again. I’ve watched series 2 and 3 countless times (skipping L&M of course), mostly because I own the dvd sets.
Favorite as in “best liked” or as in “most effective”? I’ll choose the latter and go with the unknown, nameless evil entity in Midnight. See, this is how you do a monster on a low budget.
Least favourite monster?
The Abzorbaloff (This was on the list when I reblogged it; I agree.)
Is there a character you shouldn’t love but you do?
Professor John Smith in Human Nature/Family of Blood. I get the feeling we were supposed to disapprove of the stuffy, conventional human professor, but I don’t like doing what I’m supposed to do.
Is there a character you shouldn’t hate but you do?
Rose. Or rather the awful caricature of a needy, clingy girlfriend that she became, who I call ROES.
Favourite pairing from the show?
What episode made you cry most?
I really wish they’d drop this whole “things that make you cry are good” idea. Real life is sad enough. That being said, the Master “dying” scene in Last of the Time Lords did bring a tear to my eye — even after the completely ludicrous TinkerbellJesus!Doctor scene that came before it. I put that down to John Simm’s and David Tennant’s insanely good acting skills — not to mention how we were left with thoughts of “what they could have done in this serial!” instead of going for the prosthetics and special effects.
What episode made you laugh the most?
I don’t really laugh at Doctor Who, though it has funny bits in most episodes. I don’t know, I can’t think of any offhand. The Christmas InvasionThe Runaway Bride*? “Stop slapping me!” Seeing Ten get smacked around by Donna is always good for a chuckle or two.
(*Ooops. I admit I can’t keep the names of the Christmas specials straight. Also, I forgot about The Lodger, which had several laugh-out-loud moments.)
What episode confused you the most?
I’ve been avoiding the ones with the confusing bits this series. From the old show, the ones with Seven where he was being all devious and nothing the other characters were saying made any sense because the scriptwriter had taken hallucinogenic mushrooms.
Weirdest episode you’ve ever seen?
This is Doctor Who. I can’t believe it’s even necessary to ask that question.
Do you watch Torchwood?
No. I did during its first season, but never warmed to its Spock’s Beard World version of Doctor Who. (Captain Jack is basically the Doctor from all that slash fic where everyone is OOC.)
Ever seen the Sarah Jane Adventures?
Just a couple and I don’t really remember them. I need to rent out the dvds one of these days.
Favourite actor/actress in the show?
In the old show: Tom Baker, Peter Davison, Mark Strickson (Turlough), Mary Tamm (Romana I), Lalla Ward (Romana II), Elisabeth Sladen, Nicholas Courtney (The Brig!). From the new: David Tennant, Matt Smith, Catherine Tate, Arthur Darvill.
If you were to be stuck in an elevator with one character, who would it be?
If you were to go out drinking with a character, who would it be?
Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart and Sarah Jane Smith. I’ll bet they had some stories…
If you had to reveal your darkest secret to a character, who would it be?
The Doctor. Companions who keep secrets from the Doctor (that would be most of them) always fuck him up. I wouldn’t be doing that.
If you had to go on a date with a character, who would it be?
What the fuck is this, Tiger Beat? I’m nearly fifty, I don’t “go on dates.”
Your favourite character who has died?
The Doctor. He’s died ten times.
Most attractive character?
The Doctor of course.
Most attractive Doctor?
Physically: Ten. As someone to go on an adventure with: Four. As someone to just hang out with: Eleven.
Most attractive companion?
Old show: Romana I. Mary Tamm, rowr. From the new show: Rory. There’s something about his nose… Okay, that takes care of physically attractive. Characterwise I’d have to say either Romana. Since she was one of the Doctor’s people we no longer had to hear a companion whine about wanting to go home; and also we no longer had to see the Doctor brood about his companions’ eventual deaths from old age (though that was rarely touched on in the old show; this is a gift of the new show’s writers, thanks for infecting my favorite show with your fears of old age and death, guys).
Pick one thing that happened in the show that you wish hadn’t happened?
Having the Doctor slaughter all of the Time Lords. I don’t care that he “had” to do it, it was not only massively out of character for the Doctor, it was a character rape of the Time Lords, and it’s just too heavy a theme for the show to carry.
Pick one thing you wish had happened?
An actual episode dealing with the fucking Time War. Gallifrey, Time Lords, no whiny humans, epic battles… and perhaps the Doctor could somehow save some of the good Time Lords, to give him and the show some sort of hope.
Finally, what is it you love about the show?
The idea — which is mostly subverted by the new show — that traveling about time and space in a rickety old time machine is a grand thing to do. That it’s okay to travel and have adventures as opposed to settling down. That fighting evildoers is good, not “problematic.” That sometimes you look into the abyss, and it’s full of stars.
(Note: I replaced the answers in the previous list with my own. Don’t know if that’s against Tumblr etiquette. Don’t care.)
Do you want to read my inane blatherings re Amy and her relationship with the Doctor and fan reaction and so on? Of course you do. You know it. (Warning, spoilers for some episodes though not the last one as I haven’t seen it yet.)
…why I’ve been put off watching “The Girl Who Waited.” It’s not because I don’t want to see the Doctor be dark or a companion be put through more emotional pain. It’s because I’ve been unwisely reading fan reactions and reviews and I keep seeing the following: “The ending reminded me of the end of ‘Doomsday.’” What can I say. DO NOT WANT WITH ALL CAPS FOREVER.
See, I really hated the end of “Doomsday.” That whole scene on the beach in the Peteverse basically invalidated the awesome that had gone on before as concerns the characters of Rose, Mickey, Jackie, and Pete. From a height of heroic action on the part of all four humans and the Doctor basically making the only choice he could have and then Pete’s ultimate awesome of rescuing Rose from the Void while the Doctor was helpless… we get a pathetic teary “good-bye my twoo wuv” scene between ROES and the Doctor while her family (that we were continually being told were so important to her) basically relegated to background scenery. This of course was our cue that the Doctor would never be able to let ROES go (unlike every other companion that he learned to let go and get on with their lives in the whole history of the show) and that she would hang around like an albatross, ruining his relationship with every other companion in one way or another. But I think what I resent most is that ROES was shown to be a completely selfish brat who couldn’t appreciate her own family and SELFLESS, LOVING BOYFRIEND.
Rant over. Anyway, it at least looks like with Rory they aren’t making the same horrible mistake that the show made with Mickey in relegating him to the dumped-for-the-Doctor pile. And I’m sure that the scene at the end of “Girl” is much less irritating than the one that ends “Doomsday.” (Also that later episode was a season-ender with a jarring intro to the upcoming Christmas special so there won’t be that mood whiplash, though I actually didn’t mind the levity with Surprise!Donna and “What? What?!? WHAT??!!” after the teary beach scene had sucked all the life from the ep. But that’s just me, I’ve been informed I’m a weirdo for this.) Still, the idea that there is any harking back to the emo overload of the RTD era, even in fans’ eyes, cheeses me off.
The Girl Who Got Bitter And Mean Because The Writers Decided That It Was Time To Make The Fans Cry
Okay, I’ve been catching up on some of the new season of Who, but I think I’ll give this latest episode, “The Girl Who Waited,” a pass. For one thing, I don’t need yet another affirmation of Rory and Amy’s love for each other. They’re fucking married. For another, I’m getting tired of “let’s maneuver the Doctor into a situation where he has to be a bastard, so the fans will say ‘the Doctor’s a bastard! Bad Dark Doctor!’” Not because I have any objection to Dark Doctor. From the very first show of the entire series we are made to realize that the Doctor is a person with… problems. I mean, he basically kidnaps two humans and refuses to let them go. (For Whonewbs whose experience of Doctor Who is limited to the new version, I’m referring to the very first First Doctor serial, “An Unearthly Child.” It’s great despite the five-pence-and-whatever-we-found-lying-around-the-BBC-canteen production values and the time-battered black-and-white that looks at time as if the thing had been filmed on tinfoil. You should check it out.) Anyway, it’s not like Dark Doctor is a surprise at this point, or it shouldn’t be, and I have no objection to it except for the fact that so far they don’t really seem to resolve anything when they pull some “Doctor does some cruel thing because” plot point out. Also it seems to me that they do it sort of arbitrarily, as in “this is the place where we need a Dark Doctor moment,” not as an outcome of natural consequences. For one thing, from what I’ve read it seems that in this episode the Doctor decided to lie to Amy and Rory about something when it wasn’t really necessary, telling the truth wouldn’t have changed anything, or at least it wouldn’t have made anything worse.
Just as in “Waters of Mars” Ten only seemed to have landed on Mars for purposes of being subject to emotional cruelty — unlike most of the 10th Doctor’s other episodes, there was no reason for him to be on Mars at all unless it was to set him up for a psychic beatdown. His presence did nothing — he even already knew what would happen. And in fact, he managed to rescue some of the station personnel anyway, but the way it was presented made it seem like something he shouldn’t have done and the fates or whatever (RTD’s atheism is the sort that fades in and out) threw the Doctor a bone in letting at least two of them survive.
I guess what I’m saying is I’m starting to feel that the whole Time War scenario, instead of being a tantalizing background mystery that will be revealed or resolved over the course of the show, is instead just a convenient holding place for Dark Doctor fodder. And in fact Dark Doctor itself in becoming just a gimmick, like “if the companion is a 20th century Earth person have them always moaning about wanting to go back to 20th century Earth even though they’ve been given the amazing chance to travel through all time and space with a friendly alien” was a gimmick of the classic show. Dark Doctor needs to do something besides frighten and/or piss off his companions with his dark shit. Can’t he at least kill some evil aliens while he’s in the mood? And as well, I’d thought we’d left the whole tear-at-the-heartstrings stuff behind when the RTD era ended. Just when I was beginning to feel it was safe to watch Doctor Who again…
I really need to finish watching Frontier In Space but the Draconians are such bores.
1. If I had a TARDIS, where/when would I go on my first trip and why?
To that day in the Sixties when Cher and Sonny Bono had the sex that resulted in Chastity. So I could stop them from conceiving the person who would become the atrocity known as “Chaz.” (Transvestites who dress to the nines and are fabulously glam - yes. Transsexuals who have themselves mutilated into someone that looks like the ugly sweaty guy on the crowded bus who stands behind you so his gut presses against your back - no.)
2. If I could regenerate into any already living person, who would I choose?
Me. Why would I want to be someone else? I like the idea of new teeth though.
3. What historical figure would I most like to fight aliens with?
Genghis Khan. Because he would kill them and then make their skulls into drinking vessels.
4. Would I rather work with Torchwood for life or be the Doctor’s companion for a year?
The Doctor’s companion. Traveling with the Doctor might get me killed, but working with Torchwood would get me with a sexual disease.
5. Which Doctor Who character do I think I’m most like?
The Doctor. (No ego problems there, right?)
6. Which Doctor Who character would I most like to meet?
7. What aliens would I most like to face?
The Time Lords, so I could punch their faces. “Line up, my lords.” *punch punch punch*
8. What would my Time Lord name be?
Euphorbia. Fuck, I don’t know — what’s “I’m better than all y’all” in Gallifreyan?
9. If I was a regeneration of the Doctor, what would my trademark fashion staple be?
A fabulous frock coat and riding boots. Basically I’d dress like Romana in The Horns of Nimon. Only I think my coat would be dark green velvet.
10. If I was a Time Lord, what would I look for in my companion(s)?
No family ties and no crush on me. Blecch.
11. What language would I be most excited to have translated by the TARDIS and why?
Cretan Linear A. Who wouldn’t want to know what the Minoans were writing about. Sure, it’s probably boring stuff about bins of grain and lists of king’s names, but still.
12. What design would be on my fob watch?
Some Gallifreyan scrolly writing stuff with star charts.
13. What would my sonic screwdriver look like?
Like Eleven’s only more steampunky — maybe it would be in antique brass. I would keep the green light, though — I like green.
14. Would I rather visit different times on Earth or different planets?
Different planets. This Doctor would be fucking sick of Earth.
15. If my TARDIS’s chameleon circuit broke, what would it probably end up stuck as?
[Caveat:I think "brutal honesty" is stupid, and also code words for "I feel like being a bitch." That being said... ooh! I love me some silly internet questionnaires. I'll *try* not to lie. Heh heh.]
Q:A - If I'm in love.
A:Nope. Not a bit of it. Never have been, never will. Too egotistical, I suspect
Q:B - Who the last person I talked to on the phone was.
A:My roommate, in an experiment to ascertain whether my cell phone was working. (Answer: I can call out, but I can't get calls. Time for a new service, I think.)
Q:C - How long it's been since I've kissed.
A:Yecch. I never do that. Ew.
Q:D - If I have a preference for boys or girls.
A:I'm not a pedophile, so neither.
Q:E - How many holes I have in my ears.
A:I assume this means "for earrings," not the normal ones that lead to the inside parts of the ear. Answer: one each, in the normal place (i.e., NOT the upper cartilage or that flap of cartilage in the middle, or whatever self-torture the kids are into these days).
Q:F - Give me any options, like 'hot or cold?'
A:Hot coffee, cold weather.
Q:G - The last person I said 'I love you' to.
Q:H - The last person I hugged.
Q:I - The last time I felt jealous, and why.
A:I don't get jealous. I'm an adult. No really. FFS, grow up and get your own lives.
Q:J - How old I am.
A:48. Yep it's true: me and Doctor Who (the show, not the character) are the same age.
Q:K- What my full name is.
A:Dorothea Lancaster McGillicuddy. Not really. What kind of stupid question is that to ask on the internet. (Actually it's not a secret and you can look it up with a little work but why do you care?)
Q:L - If I have siblings.
Q:M - If I forgive betrayal.
A:No, but I forget and move on, after cutting out said betrayer from my life. Life is too short to hang around with people you can't trust.
Q:N - If you want to know how I treat my friends.
A:I don't understand this question. I don't know you, so why would I care how you treat your friends? Or is it, how do I treat *my* friends? If the latter, I try to treat them the way I want them to treat me.
Q:O - If I like my school.
A:Schools in the Western world are structured like prisons, their purpose to train their inmates into becoming obedient little drones of the system. Not that I'm currently going to any school -- thank God -- but I've done a little substitute teaching which only reminded me how I hated school.
Q:P - What kind of music I like.
A:These questions are very badly phrased. Anyway, I like a variety of music. The possible exceptions are polka, and very whiny country music.
Q:Q - What the last party I went to was, and when the next will be.
A:Christmas before last I went to a coworker's Christmas party. I'm not really a party person though I enjoy them if I'm invited. No, I have no plans for any upcoming parties.
Q:R - For me to tell 10 of my curiosities.
A:What? Things I'm curious about? Weird facts about me? What? I think that the person who wrote this was not only a teenager, but one to whom English is a second language.
Q:S - 2 habits.
A:Nail biting. Answering internet questionnaires in a snarky fashion.
Q:T- 5 things I love unconditionally.
A:My cat? Though I don't consider her a "thing." Anyway, you can't really love "things" unconditionally. And no, there aren't any people I love unconditionally.
Q:U - How many texts I send daily.
A:Zero. I have a very simple phone and rarely use it even to call people. It doesn't text.
Q:V - 3 big dreams.
A:Finishing at least one of my novels and getting it published and actually selling a few copies. Being able to travel across the country, stopping at various random places along the way just because. Finishing one of my other novels and etc. I don't think those are "big" dreams, though.
Q:W - An idol.
A:I don't have idols. I do have people whose talents or accomplishments I admire, but I don't worship them for it. We all have feet of clay.
Q:X - If I've done something I regret very much.
A:Going to college. Beyond getting my AA degree, it was a waste of time and money. Or at least it was the way I did it. I didn't even finish, and now don't want to.
Q:Y - If I like my town and why.
A:I've lived here two years now. It's small and in the mountains and was founded in 1747 so it has all the requirements of oldness and not-big-cityness and not-Floridaness that I require. Also it has a rather famous theater and a population of overeducated liberals and therefore several more tony coffee shops and cute restaurants than are usually found in rural mountain towns in the South.
Q:Z - Ask any question you want.
A:What if I don't have any questions? There, answer that.